Email Service Notes (Tony)

Your Original Email

Do you know the movie called Charlie and his chocolate factory? It is a movie about family relationship. The factory’s owner put 5 golden tickets into his chocolate products. Children who get the tickets can visit the factory and one of them can has a prize. 5 children who have different backgrounds are lucky enough to get the tickets and go into the factory with one of their family members. Charlie’s family is facing a problem of money because his father’s work has been replaced by technological machine. Charlie’s grandfather had worked in that chocolate factory when he was young, but one of the staff who worked in it betrayed the owner, then the factory closed and no one knows who was working in it. So it is a exciting news for people to know that they have a chance to visit it because all of them are very curious about it. There are some news to report when the other 4 children got the golden tickets. Charlie picked 10 dollars up at one side of a street and he spend it to getting a chocolate. He is a lucky boy and he get the finial one. Then Charlie and his grandfather visit the factory with other 4 families. They see the amazing inside of that factory and each family meet a problem because they don’t follow the rules except Charlie. Finally, only Charlie and his grandfather end the trip and the owner decide to give him the factory as a prize but the condition is Charlie need to live with him in the factory and he will not see his family members. Charlie rejected it and that decision made the owner remember his father and why he established the chocolate factory. He went to see his father, who is a dentist, accompanied by Charlie. At the ending of the movie, Charlie and his family lived happily in the chocolate factory with the owner, and the owner realized that family members and family relationships are the most important things in the world.

Your Edited Email

Do you know the movie called Charlie and the chocolate factory? It is a movie about family relationships. The factory’s owner put 5 golden tickets into his chocolate products. Children who get the tickets can visit the factory and one of them can get a prize. 5 children who have different backgrounds are lucky enough to get the tickets and go into the factory with one of their family members. Charlie’s family is facing money problems because his father’s work has been replaced by technological machines. Charlie’s grandfather had worked in that chocolate factory when he was young, but one of the staff who worked in it betrayed the owner. Then the factory closed itself off to the public and no one knew who was working in it. So it is an exciting story for people to know that they have a chance to visit it because they are all very curious about it. There are some news stories to report when the other 4 children got the golden tickets. Charlie picked up 10 dollars on the street and he spent it on a chocolate bar. He is a lucky boy and he get the final ticket. Then Charlie and his grandfather visit the factory with the other 4 families. They see the amazing inside of that factory and each family runs into a problem because they don’t follow the rules except Charlie. Finally, only Charlie and his grandfather end the trip and the owner decides to give him the factory as a prize but the condition is that Charlie needs to live with him in the factory and he will not see his family members. Charlie rejected it and that decision made the owner remember his father and why he established the chocolate factory. He went to see his father, who is a dentist, accompanied by Charlie. At the ending of the movie, Charlie and his family lived happily in the chocolate factory with the owner, and the owner realized that family members and family relationships are the most important things in the world.