Email Service Notes 28th April (Tony)

Your Original Email:

An unforgettable experience
Five years ago in winter, me and all of my coworkers had dinner in MinHang district, which was a routine one time every year.
During dinner, we ate, drank and chated with others that was full of fun. I was so excited that I drank too much beer and wine. I could stop drinking alcohol after I felt I had been a little drunk. However, in that circumstance, I could not control myself. The result was that I was totally drunk. I didn’t even know how I went to the subway station. I was too drunk to get on the subway on my own/by myself, so I called my father to pick me up/get me. During waiting for my father coming, I slumped against the wall. At that time, a lady saw me and came towards me.
‘Are you ok?’ She asked me as holding me.
I believed that I was incoherent/I spoke with no reason and later vomitted/throw up. What touched my heart so strongly was that she looked after me till/until my father arrived at the station. Many people may ran away when they saw me being drunk. This lady is so kind. She thought I would be in worse condition without people’s help, then she came to help me.From her sentences, I knew she is from AnHui. unfortunately, I have forgotten her appearance. I really want to express my thanks in person,but the chance is tiny. Every time I think this thing back, I am So grateful for what she has done for me.
I won’t forget this benign lady even though I don’t know who she is.

Your Corrected Email:

An unforgettable experience
Five years ago in winter, me and all of my coworkers had dinner in MinHang district, which became a yearly routine.
During dinner, we had a lot of fun chatting, eating and drinking. I was so excited that I drank a little too much. I usually cut myself off after I start feeling drunk. However, in this case, I could not control myself, so I got wasted. I didn’t even know how I got to the subway station. I was too drunk to get on the subway by myself, so I called my dad to pick me up. While I was waiting for my dad to come, I slumped against the wall. A lady saw me and came towards me.
‘Are you ok?’ She asked me as she was holding me.
I thought that I was incoherent and later threw up. What touched my heart so strongly was that she looked after me till my dad arrived at the station. Many people probably ran away when they saw me being so drunk. This lady is so kind. She thought I would be in worse condition without someone’s help, then she came to help me. From what she said, I knew she is from AnHui. unfortunately, I have forgotten what she looks like. I really want to express my thanks in person, but there isn’t really a chance. Every time I think back on this, I am So grateful for what she has done for me.
I won’t forget this sweet lady even though I don’t know who she is.