Email Service Notes (Raph)

Your Original Email

Hi Tony,
Thanks for your guide to use the word and phrase in a sentence, it is helpful.
On the trip of the English learning, I still concern about the way to improve because I cannot jump out of my job, I will use the word and sentence which I familiar to but avoid using what I cannot reach.
Basically, I also want to improve my life English, just like having a lunch and I order the dishes, how to talk with the waiter or waitress.
Example: after my English class, I bought a bread as my lunch in a bakery shop. There are many types of the breads in the shop, milk toast, whole wheat bread and croissant … there is a conversation which happened between the waitress and I
Me: Hi, I’d like the Multiple Cereals Honey Bee Bread, could you please take half of the bread to me?
Waitress: ok, wait a moment, this bread is freshly baked so it is a little bit hot. All right, here you are
Me: looks good, thanks
I go to the casher
Me: pay with Payral
Casher: Fine, it is 20RMB, do you want to cut to pieces
Me: no, thanks
Casher: ok, here your bread
Me: thanks, bye

Your Edited Email

Hi Tony,
Thanks for your guidance on how to use words and phrases in a sentence. It is helpful.

On this English learning journey, I still feel concerned about the best way to improve. As I cannot just quit my job, I will use words and sentences which are familiar to me, but avoid using others that are not. I also want to improve my day-to-day English, so I can do things such as order the dishes and talk with the waiter or waitress when I’m having lunch.

A good example of how that improvement could be helpful for me happened after my English class, when I bought bread for lunch at a bakery. There were many types of bread in the shop: milk toast, whole wheat bread, croissant, etc., and I had a conversation about it with one of their salespeople:
Me: Hi, I’d like the Multi-Cereal Honey Bee Bread, could you please take half of the it for me?
Salesperson: Ok, wait a moment, this bread is just out of the oven, so it is still a little hot. All right, here you are.
Me: Looks good, thanks
I then went to the cashier
Me: I’d like to pay with Payral
Cashier: Fine, it is 20RMB, do you want it to be cut into pieces?
Me: No, thanks
Cashier: Ok, here your bread
Me: Thanks, bye