Email Service Notes (Nick)

Your Original Email

This is my first time to work. I went to McDonald‘S with indescribable heart. When I went in, I knew that my work will begin. Cause this is the first time, I only need to work for 4h. In these 4h, I hadn’t drink water, eat something or go to the toilet. After work, I felt so tired but really happy. From the work, I learned a lot of things that I cannot learn in the class.

Your Edited Email

This is my first time to work / This is the first time I have ever had a job / This was my first day at work. I went to McDonald‘s with an indescribable heart / I felt strange arriving at McDonald’s. When I went in, I knew that my work will was about to begin. Because this is was my the first time/day, I only needed to work for 4h. In these 4h / During these 4h I hadn’t didn’t drink any water, eat some anything or go to the toilet. After work, I felt so tired but really happy. From the work, I learned a lot of things that I cannot learn in the class.