Email Service Notes (Nemo)

You’re welcome Amy!

N

Original:

Hi Nemo,
Really nice of you to let me know so many new words, this is a new way to learn words because it is based on the English meaning and example sentence which is more effective to remember than previous way – remember the Chinese meaning only. Good learning trip with you
For this email, I prefer to talk about my life story which include the new word I learned today
Story one – clumsy
Well, in the end of last year I decided to learn to drive a car. Before starting to learn, I thought it was not difficult because so many people whoever is young or old, a man or women drive the car on the road so why not me. but when I sat in a car, as if my feet and hands were not mine. when the coach said, turn right, but I went left, when the coach told me to step on the brake but I pressed the accelerator. That was very crazy, I know I was clumsy on driving car but now is better even though I still have not got the driving license.
Story two- Literally
There is a Wechat public account for my Company, we always release the products promotion articles in this account both English and Chinese version within. All English versions are downloaded from the homepage of headquarters but the Chinese version need to be translated by ourselves. So as a none English background guy, I always translate it too literally and do not consider it in the phrase and sentence too much, so looks not natural. One friend of mine who is major in English told me, you should learn English, as well as Chinese, then can translate it well
Story three- naughty and obey
My mum told me, it was hard to manage me when I was a child. I was a such girl who like to play with boys and was naughty in terms of my behavior- climbing trees and arresting fish in the river. By the way, the culture of China is different from Euro and United States. So maybe in your point of view, that is nothing but in China it was problem that time. I obeyed the rules what my parents set and go outside with my cousin that had not be allowed. But I am proud of that because I am different just like my daughter, she is similar to me.
Sorry Nemo, this email is little bit longer, thanks for your time to check it and let me know error which I made

Thanks
Amy

Corrected:

Hi Nemo,
It was really nice of you to teach me so many new words. This is a new way to learn words, because it is based on the English meanings and example sentences, which is a more a effective way to remember than the previous way – remembering the Chinese meaning only. It was a good learning experience with you.
For this email, I prefer to talk about my life story, and in which I’ll include the new words I learned today.
Story one – Clumsy
Well, at the end of last year, I decided to learn how to drive a car. Before starting to learn, I thought it was not difficult, because so many people however young or old, men or women drive, so why wouldn’t I. But when I sat in the car, it was as if my feet and hands were not mine. When the coach said, “Turn right“, I went left. When the coach told me to step on the brake, I pressed the accelerator. That was * crazy. I know I was clumsy driving the car, but now I’m better, even though I still have not got my driver’s license.
Story two- Literally
There is a WeChat public account for my Company. We always release product promotion articles from this account, including both English and Chinese versions. All English versions are downloaded from the company website, but the Chinese version needs to be translated by us. As a non-native English speaker, I always translate it too literally and do not consider much how it fits within the phrase or sentence, so it doesn’t look natural. A friend of mine who is a major in English told me, “You should learn English, as well as Chinese, then you can translate it well.“

Story three- Naughty and Obey
My mum told me that it was hard to manage me when I was a child. I was the kind of girl who likes to play with boys and was naughty in my behavior – climbing trees and catching fish in the river. By the way, the culture of China is different from Europe and the United States. So maybe in your point of view, that was not a big deal, but in China at that time, it was a problem. I obeyed the rules that my parents set, but once I went outside with my cousin who was not allowed to out (grounded) at the time.  But I am proud of that, because I am different – just like my daughter; she is similar to me.
Sorry Nemo, this email is a little bit long. Thanks for taking the time to check it and let me know about the errors I made.

Thanks
Amy