Email Service Notes 20th January (Celeste)

Original

Dear Techer, I had written an article about the topic i told on the clss yesterday. Some sentences base on the gramma you taughe me .
I think the way of writting such kind of article can instead of quick review in class somehow. Besides, I can recite the article with my pronounciation, checking my pronounciation also a review method.
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When I was 10 years old, my PE teacher recommended me to do a sport like high jump. High jump is a sport that needs athlete’s good body conditions. I had danced from 4-10 years old, that made my body flexible.
I remembered , one day before competition, I fell down the floor from cushion when I practice. My Coach was serious about me.But I didn’t get obvious hurt that time. And I said” I am OK” to my coach and father.
With the time goes, I found something abnormal wrong with my jaw and teeth structure. I went to see the professional doctor, he proposed that I might get some injury when I was teenager. That made my jaw bone grow not well. He also supplied me a solution that is to make surgery. To adjust my teeth and jaw structure through surgery.Thinking of every surgery has risk in some extent, I give up that way and keep the status up to now.
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Many Thanks !

Olivia

Edited

Dear SE, I had written an article about the topic I spoke about in class yesterday. Some sentences are based on the grammar you taught me.
I think writing this kind of article is better instead of a quick review in class. Besides, I can read the article and check my pronunciation as a review method.

When I was 10 years old, my PE teacher recommended me to do a sport like high jump. High jump is a sport that needs athletes’ bodies to be in good condition. I had danced from 4-10 years old which made my body flexible.
I remembered, one day before competition, I fell down on the floor from a cushion when I was practicing. My coach was worried about me, but I wasn’t obviously hurt at that time. I said, “I am OK,” to my coach and father.
As time went on, I found something abnormally wrong with my jaw and teeth structure. I went to see a doctor, he guessed/assumed that I might have had some injury when I was a teenager that made my jaw bone grow incorrectly. He also suggested that I have surgery to adjust my teeth and jaw structure. All surgeries have risks to some extent so I won’t get the surgery and instead just keep on living/going.

I’m looking forward your kind reply!
Many Thanks!

Olivia