DouYin Writing Notes (Ivy – Jesse 大胡å­è€å¸ˆ)

Jesse*New Student - PUT NAME IN TITLE*

Ivy

Vocabulary: 2.25
Grammar: 1.5
Sentences: 1.75
English logic: 1.25
6.75

 — EVERY TIME YOU WRITE, THINK OF THIS: — 

WRITING: make longer sentences + think about do / did / have done / have been doing
RECOMMENDATION: write 2-3 times a week about your life – like a diary

Thank you for doing our writing competition! If you have any questions about the notes or anything, please just ask me. 🙂
Jesse 大胡å­è€å¸ˆ

Writing exercise

i got up at 11:00am yesterday，then i ate a bowl of pumpkin porridge.i already have no eat any hard food around one month，because i have made a surgery for my chin.i can not open my mouth too much and chew anything.i feel so sad.i was Working until to 19:00.Dinner is milk and cake.i lost 4kg in this month.i feel hungry every time.That’s no good feeling.tomorrow I will send my cousin to airport in the morning,she does not know how to going to there and check in.So I should be help her.It’s too late,I must going to sleep,good night.

i got up at 11:00am yesterday and then i ate a bowl of pumpkin porridge / congee (porridge is usually oats or cereal but congee is rice). i haven’t eaten solid food for around one month，because i had a surgery on my chin so i cannot open my mouth too much or chew anything. This has made me feel so sad / annoyed / frustrated. i have been working until 19:00 / 7PM every night recently and dinner has been milk and cake which caused me to lose 4kg this month. i’m hungry all the time which is not a good feeling. Tomorrow I will take my cousin to the airport in the morning, because she does not know how to go there or how to check in. So, I thought that I should help her. It’s too late now so I should go to bed. Good night!

From the teacher

Hi there, thanks so much for your writing – it was really interesting hearing about your surgery and eating habits these days. I’m sorry you’re not comfortable!!

So, about your English – I think that some of your sentences are good, and you know some words that are very useful. However – there are some problems with your grammar when you talk about different times. Remember that these are different: I do / I did / I have done. The time is in the verb.

I go to work = every day / sometimes / all the time
I went to work = past time – you know what time I’m talking about
I have been to work = past time – which time is not important

So when you say “recently” or “in the last 2 weeks” you should use “have done” because it’s past, but it’s not a specific time. This is hard, but keep trying and focusing on this.

Also, remember  =you need to make longer sentences. Use conjunctions (è¿žè¯) to make longer sentences – for example: “I went to the park because I wanted to see the birds.†This is very important for English if you want to stop using Chinglish.

Great job – keep studying! 🙂